Wednesday, April 11, 2018

This is Total Bullcorn!!!


What is going on? I turn my back from this blog for eight years and now country music icons are using corny dogs to get attention online.  It would be forgivable if it was Ray Wylie Hubbard, Mickey Newbury, or even Miranda Lambert (from Lindale, the town I grew up near). But Reba McEntire is from Oklahoma!!! She also obviously took this idea from me.  That she would be aware of the obnoxious and pretentious ramblings of a nobody in the most obscure corner of the internet and then feel the need to steal them is pathetic.

I will note that I didn't include Willie Nelson on the above list of Texans because I am still upset that he supported Lone Star in it's 1970s battle against Pearl to become the primary lawn-mowing beer of Texas.


Here is a fellow East Texan who should also be put on punishment.


This could be forgivable as it supposedly references his role as the young Sheriff Buddy Deeds in the 1996 John Sayles masterpiece Lone Star.  Deeds was played as an older man by the Country legend and one of the great film actors of the 1970s Kris Kristofferson (Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore, Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid, and Heaven's Gate, not the religious cult but the Cimino film that bankrupted United Artists and ended 70s Hollywood).  However, in the film Lone Star they clearly drink Falstaff.


Pearl did have its own bad history with the unfortunate jingle "Pearl's not a girl it's a Beer" and another featuring the reactionary Merle Haggard of Bakersfield, CA.  My main concern is that Pearl has become unknown as a Texas beer, even though it was from San Antonio and dominated sales in the state for decades, mostly because it is easier to identify the name Lone Star with Texas and it's been promoted by the likes of Willie Nelson.  This despite the fact that Lone Star was founded in part by Adolphus Busch and owned by Anheuser-Busch as early as 1895 

I am aware that Hubbard also references Lone Star beer in Redneck Mother.  But drinking that, along with his "I'd rather be a roper than a doper" bumper sticker, is one of the crimes for which he will be put against the wall when the revolution comes. It is also interesting that in Jerry Jeff Walker's hit version of the song the redneck (an Oklahoman just like Reba) drinks the national brand Falstaff.  Falstaff himself, in Henry IV, drinks the fortified wine sack and not beer at all.  That is also the drink of this man from Bakersfield.


Yes Frank Gifford and not Cowboy great and Willie Nelson fan Dandy Don Meredith, who did famously promote Alamo Beer on King of the Hill.
    
But wait, back to corn.

I wouldn't have been upset even if someone I hated was known online for eating corny dogs.


Even though he is pictured here at the Iowa State fair, Rick Perry was the Governor of Texas and once a cheerleader at Texas A&M.  Also I don't think he is happy this picture is online. One wonders if he is more worried that Texans will find out that he has experience suppressing his gag reflex or that he was actually eating a veggie dog here. 

Because of the obvious humor, you can find pictures of everyone from Obama and Michele Bachman to Kim Kardashian eating corn dogs. I am not going to do that because this blog isn't and never was about corn dogs or posting pictures of me eating them (despite Kendra trying to force me into it that time at a 7-11 in Tokyo).  Reba can have those pictures because I don't go for cheap, obvious material like that.

However, I have been interested in this.


This is a pickle corny dog they are selling now at Rangers' games.  Sadly, I can not eat it as my failing liver limits my salt intake.  I can't eat the all-beef wiener either because of the toxins my liver can't filter.  As a native Texan the beef prohibition does not bother me, just as I don't mind that I can't own a Ford F150 pickup here in New York because it would be hard to park.

The limits on salt and my teetotaling unfortunately have kept me away from this blog. That and the fact that keeping a blog is rather pointless (i.e. I'm too good for this blog).  I may never think of another thing to put here. But I wanted everyone to know that the "Queen of Country Music" is a biter. 

btw: I do like that she is portraying Colonel Sanders, although I love Norm MacDonald and want him to get work.

one more thing: The comment about blogs being pointless does not apply to stillisstillmoving.com  the Willie Nelson fan site where I found that great picture of Willie drinking Lone Star.  But it does apply to all other blogs, especially food blogs. Stop taking pictures of your food, what is this the '00s?

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